Goosie continues to grow in beauty and I fear for the years ahead. I wonder if I have paid enough attention to her through the years of growing and changing she has already experienced. My mamma days are the same length, just becoming more in depth. With the preteen years come more reasons for her to start drifting away on her own. Independence, it is such a scary word for parents. Knowing that it is vast approaching makes things all the more frightening. How I wish I could hold her close and keep her safe. But there is a big wide world out there and it will be calling her to come and explore. Not yet though, my Goosie, not yet. You still have so much to learn and I have still more to teach you. Beauty is so different to me then it was ten years ago when I met your Daddy. The definition of which changes ever so much daily. My sweet sweet girl. You are so beautiful to me. Your smile and laughter fill my heart with joy.
I am convinced that with each child you grow another heart, only this time it beats outside of you. How fiercely you want to shelter it, directly interferes with how much you have to let it go. It's interesting that the moment a child is born the parents rejoice; yet through the years as they ache to hold on.. they have in fact been letting go. When you truly love someone this is always the case. You never question if their need out weighs yours, because it always will. Love is selfless, if it is defined any other way I am not convinced it can be called love.
