Earlier this evening we had about 20 kids (including ours) at the house for a harvest party. It was fun! I really enjoy living vicariously through my children during the holidays. When I was younger I remember wishing that the holidays were all about me and what I wanted. Now I could care less about what I get, it is all about my three blessings! Hubby was superb tonight. He is always so thoughtful, yes I planned the party.. but without him, I am positive it would have been a bust! There was trick or treating in the neighborhood afterward's and surprisingly there were few kids who were willing to brave the hill in the front yard to get to the door. Those who were willing were rewarded. I wouldn't mind a handful of dum-dums.
Goosie, Miniman and Bubbles were all quite exasperated at the end of the day. I myself should be sleeping. I woke up around 5 this morning and was unable to get back to sleep. It was an exciting day. My friend H was here and brought her children. K came with her two little ones and brought along her husband. I didn't want to let K's new little one go.. I would like to have another baby ( I know I know that is another blog all it's own). A came with her two little ones, there was M with her daughter, K with her daughter, and AC with her son. The kids all had so much fun and I must admit that it was nice to see everyone that was able to come. There was catch the apple, coloring pages, an inflatables jumping room, and a pinata. Time defiantly flew and by the time we got around to knocking around the pinata it was time to trick or treat around the neighborhood. It was a good night.
Other then that not much has been happening. I passed my first final for my pharmacy technicians certification. Bubbles is almost potty trained, Goosie is doing well at school and Miniman is learning to write his name. Hubby is doing well at work and told me the other day that he was hearing rumors he could be getting his own station again and that could mean that we are moving. Nothing is certain. We will just have to see. It has been a little over two months since my surgery and I must say I am very pleased with my results. Now to just work out the way I know I need to and the rest of my post baby body will fall in line. That is something I am coming to terms with. Since my chest is smaller, everything else feels so much bigger. I think everyone has issues with their bodies, but the collective thought is that we project our insecurities on others and find faults easier in them then we do ourselves. Ok, my brain is going wonky I need to go to bed, so if the end of this didn't make any sense to you, don't worry it didn't make any sense to me either.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Thoughtfulness
I have been thinking about many things lately. Yesterday I received a call from a friend I had made in Sandpoint. She and I still exchange email messages, but with me out here and her moving around too, it has been a few years since I have seen H. H did want to join the army at one time, thus being the way we met. She wasn't able to join, but we did become friends. H now lives in NY. Anyway she called me the other day and told me that she had been recently diagnosed with Mesothelioma or lung cancer caused from asbestos. I didn't know what to say, so I encouraged her and prayed for her.
My other friend H who lived here in Ohio, is trying to get her oldest ready for homecoming. How dreadful and exciting! Dreadful because I can't imagine how H must be feeling, and exciting because her daughter is elated! I am clearly not ready for my girls to grow up. In the spring I sat down with a group of ladies and showed them how to crochet. One woman C has kept it up, another who was interested in knitting A (yes, I helped her too) has also kept it up and I must admit that A is doing some wonderful work! I am very glad to have helped her get started on something so calming and creative.
On a different note, all three of my lovies aren't feeling well. Goosie came down with it first. Just an upper respiratory infection. No big deal the Dr tells me. Now Miniman is not feeling well and missed school yesterday and Bubbles has also started the cough. I feel horrible. I am not sick, but when all three of your little ones are, it makes things all the more overwhelming. So please keep my little ones in your prayers.
Hubby I think is at an impasse at work. There are many things he is tired of and honestly nothing he can do about any of it. 4 years until retirement so I try to encourage him to stick it out. There would be no sense in getting out now. So according to the game plan he will be submitting his paperwork on the first and then we could be moving anytime after that. It will be par for the course, but this time I won't be pregnant. I am hoping we don't move in the middle of the school year, but if we do I am sure the kids will be fine.
I have been going to an Esther bible study on Tuesdays when Goosie and Miniman are in school. Bubbles happily goes to childcare and I can sit for a few hours and submerse myself in the word. The bible study does cover many things from the historical stand point, to how it refers to us today. Something that I struggled with before my surgery was dressing appropriately for my size. It wasn't easy, to be one size on the top and more then a few sizes different on the bottom. Now that I am more proportioned it has gotten a little easier to dress myself. I am just running into another problem. As H put it to her daughter " honey you aren't that tall, most people around you are taller then you, so if you can see too much, so can they". This is my new mantra for getting dressed. I want others to be comfortable around me, so as another friend put it, dress cute, not sexy. Sexy is after all for Hubby and in all honesty I don't want other men to look at me that way. I of course realize that there are some that will no matter what, but I am able to do what I can to make it harder for them. I am a mother of two beautiful girls, I don't want them to think that their value lies in their looks, more in their hearts. A beautiful heart far out weighs any physical beauty, after all. I want to teach them to be mindful of their appearance, and not let it consume them. I know that the best way to teach them is to be an example.
Well, dear readers I have much to accomplish today and with all three little ones home it may take longer to do then I first anticipated. So for now, be blessed and I will be praying for you.
My other friend H who lived here in Ohio, is trying to get her oldest ready for homecoming. How dreadful and exciting! Dreadful because I can't imagine how H must be feeling, and exciting because her daughter is elated! I am clearly not ready for my girls to grow up. In the spring I sat down with a group of ladies and showed them how to crochet. One woman C has kept it up, another who was interested in knitting A (yes, I helped her too) has also kept it up and I must admit that A is doing some wonderful work! I am very glad to have helped her get started on something so calming and creative.
On a different note, all three of my lovies aren't feeling well. Goosie came down with it first. Just an upper respiratory infection. No big deal the Dr tells me. Now Miniman is not feeling well and missed school yesterday and Bubbles has also started the cough. I feel horrible. I am not sick, but when all three of your little ones are, it makes things all the more overwhelming. So please keep my little ones in your prayers.
Hubby I think is at an impasse at work. There are many things he is tired of and honestly nothing he can do about any of it. 4 years until retirement so I try to encourage him to stick it out. There would be no sense in getting out now. So according to the game plan he will be submitting his paperwork on the first and then we could be moving anytime after that. It will be par for the course, but this time I won't be pregnant. I am hoping we don't move in the middle of the school year, but if we do I am sure the kids will be fine.
I have been going to an Esther bible study on Tuesdays when Goosie and Miniman are in school. Bubbles happily goes to childcare and I can sit for a few hours and submerse myself in the word. The bible study does cover many things from the historical stand point, to how it refers to us today. Something that I struggled with before my surgery was dressing appropriately for my size. It wasn't easy, to be one size on the top and more then a few sizes different on the bottom. Now that I am more proportioned it has gotten a little easier to dress myself. I am just running into another problem. As H put it to her daughter " honey you aren't that tall, most people around you are taller then you, so if you can see too much, so can they". This is my new mantra for getting dressed. I want others to be comfortable around me, so as another friend put it, dress cute, not sexy. Sexy is after all for Hubby and in all honesty I don't want other men to look at me that way. I of course realize that there are some that will no matter what, but I am able to do what I can to make it harder for them. I am a mother of two beautiful girls, I don't want them to think that their value lies in their looks, more in their hearts. A beautiful heart far out weighs any physical beauty, after all. I want to teach them to be mindful of their appearance, and not let it consume them. I know that the best way to teach them is to be an example.
Well, dear readers I have much to accomplish today and with all three little ones home it may take longer to do then I first anticipated. So for now, be blessed and I will be praying for you.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Thoughts on a Past
I was thinking about many things as I put the girls to sleep tonight. One of which was a girl I used to know. Here she is at 16, ready to go to her junior prom and from the look on her face ready to take on the world too. Her sister did her hair and makeup, another sister loaned her the money for her dress (it was the first one she picked out for herself at the store). Her date that night was a friend she had asked to accompany her only a few days before and was gracious enough to get everything as ready as it could be. One memory she has of that night is that she danced and hung out with friends until the makeup had worn off her face, her hair had fallen flat and she even managed to break a heel. That's right she was in it for the minute and made no jokes about it.
Only a few short years later this girl woman was engaged. And with everything in her she knew it wasn't right. That for some reason this man/boy that she had attached herself to for 3 years was not hers. She called off the engagement, returned the ring and set out to find herself.
Here she is again. Just short of her 22nd birthday. She had all but given up on finding that one and only, she was ready to
settle. But the man/boy she thought she could settle on had already promised himself to another. So this girl/woman now saw herself thrown in a fit of depression. There were a few potentials, but she didn't falter. In her heart of hearts she knew he was out there, and that one day if she were lucky enough they would find each other. She was becoming comfortable in her own skin and felt for the first time that other people could really see her. Gone was the hair that hung down past the middle of her back. She had grown far too accustomed to hiding herself. Now in a new found boldness she was stepping out.
settle. But the man/boy she thought she could settle on had already promised himself to another. So this girl/woman now saw herself thrown in a fit of depression. There were a few potentials, but she didn't falter. In her heart of hearts she knew he was out there, and that one day if she were lucky enough they would find each other. She was becoming comfortable in her own skin and felt for the first time that other people could really see her. Gone was the hair that hung down past the middle of her back. She had grown far too accustomed to hiding herself. Now in a new found boldness she was stepping out.
Here she is again, only this time you can really see her smile. Look, it's there.. not just on her lips look in her eyes. This picture was taken 7 years ago. This wonderful man sat down beside her and with all sincerity said that she was adorable and not just because she was short. Yep, that's the line that got her heart. But it wasn't just what he said, it was how he said it. Look at those two. So eager to "get the party started". They didn't know where the party would take them or what all it even entailed. She left it all behind. Her sisters, everyone she had ever known, to be with him. And in that 7 years she has not recanted her decision. Sure there are times when it would be easier to give up or give in, but what would that prove? Only that the 16 year old really couldn't take on the world, find happiness and peace.
For those of you who haven't figured it out, that 16 year old was me.. and that happy couple is Hubby and I shortly after we met. It has been a wild ride, some of it not quite fun. I wonder sometimes where that 16, or 22 year old me went. She is still right here, waiting ever so patiently for the "MOM" to be done so she can be free. Yes there are times when the laugh lines are fewer then they should be and those creases between my brows look as if they have been plowed there. But for the most part I think I am still the same person I used to be. Maybe not as slight, but definitely as determined or as Hubby chooses to describe me.. devoted.
For those of you who haven't figured it out, that 16 year old was me.. and that happy couple is Hubby and I shortly after we met. It has been a wild ride, some of it not quite fun. I wonder sometimes where that 16, or 22 year old me went. She is still right here, waiting ever so patiently for the "MOM" to be done so she can be free. Yes there are times when the laugh lines are fewer then they should be and those creases between my brows look as if they have been plowed there. But for the most part I think I am still the same person I used to be. Maybe not as slight, but definitely as determined or as Hubby chooses to describe me.. devoted.
Around The Horn
I have been slack. That's right slack and I have no excuse for it. I have not been doing my course work as I should have and lets face it there is no excuse for not continuing your education when it is both free and lets face it any time you can broaden your mind and expand your horizon it is a gift. I decided to move some things around. Namely my computer. It is now securely in my bedroom, on my side of the bed, and I have all of my equipment there too. It is different. To have my office space in my bedroom. But I must admit that I already am able to concentrate a little better and I am able to shut the door if need be. Just three more chapters and I will be able to start the calculations portion of my study. After that I will be able to take my certification exam and I pray I will be a certified pharmacy technician by Valentine's Day. I have a full year to complete the course, but I would like to have it done before then.
Goosie and Miniman are doing wonderfully in school. Goosie came home with a progress report and I must admit that I felt like a failure. There is a 1 to 3 scale. 1 meaning that you need more help and attention in those area's and 3 meaning that you have grasped the lesson and are ready to move on to something else. My Goosie had 2's across the board. I blame myself, I know that I did not take her preschool as seriously as I should have and now instead of my bright little button being at the head of the class she is slightly behind. I have talked with a few people about this. My Mom and my friend H. They both said the same thing, that there is nothing wrong with Goosie being where she is and that it is still so early in the school year that it should be nothing to assist her however possible so that she can excel in all she does.
Miniman is doing wonderfully and is learning how to write his name. He is doing a fine job of it too! I think that he really likes to write the letter Z and rightly so as it is quite angular and I think will help him with writing all of the other letters in the alphabet. He had a class field trip last week and had so much fun it was all he could talk about for two days! Miniman and Hubby are playing trains in Miniman's room right now and I must admit that my heart smiles at the knowledge of their growing relationship.Oh and on a side note, the kids are requesting homework time!
Bubbles is quite the bubbly personality and I think she is hitting another growth spurt. She has been eating like craziness! I sometimes think she is just hiding it all in her toes! She just smiles and goes about her business. She is also quite at ease with things around her. Hubby was saying the other day that Bubbles is the most laid back of the three. She also has become more verbal, and her words are very definite. Bubbles knows what she likes that is for sure!
Hubby is doing as well as he can at work, there are things happening that shouldn't be happening and it is very frustrating at times. I can't get into things like I want to because lets face it there are something that don't need to be addressed unless you first address the individuals who are involved. Hubby said that he will handle things as he sees fit and I trust both his judgement and discretion. To do otherwise is not supportive, nor is it helping him in anyway. So I will say what I want in my head and let you all just pray that God will have his will and way in the situation. That being said, it has been a good run here in Ohio, but with Hubby up for retirement in a few years I can hardly wait for the one last move and get finally settled in our "Home".
On a lighter note, I volunteer with many things to keep myself busy. One of which is MOPS I am sure most of you have heard about MOPS and at least slightly aware of it. My role in MOPS is the hospitality coordinator. It is quite enjoyable and I must say at times it wears me out. But it is a good thing. I enjoy serving others and making sure things run smoothly. Behind the scenes I am quite content. At our last meeting we were talking about ways to recycle and different things we could do to teach our children different ways to be a good steward of one of God's most wonderful gifts.. our planet. I didn't bring my idea with me but wanted to share it anyway as I felt it was something anyone could do. It went something like this:
J. ~ "Does anyone have anything they would like to share with the group?"
Me~ " I grew a pot garden over the summer"
Then there were looks, giggles..
Me~ " wait that didn't sound right, it was a herb garden, oh wait that is even worse"
J. ~ "Well, you just never know what you are going to get when you come to MOPS!"
Me~ " yeah, don't eat the brownies.."
laughter
Me ~ " But really I used an egg carton to plant the seeds, then my kids and I transferred the plants to different containers I had used around the house. We had lettuce, tomatoes, peppers, cabbage, and all kinds of things growing from various containers. Goosie really liked it and all three kids really enjoyed watering the plants, it was something they looked forward to everyday."
After which I sat down.. I don't think I turned red, but I am not sure. After all I think it was Ben Franklin that said "a slip of the foot you may soon recover, but a slip of the tongue you may never get over". It was an interesting meeting.
I digress, I must end this entry here. There are things that need my attention that don't have keyboards. Until next time dear readers remember it is a sacrifice of praise that is the hardest to give, it is born out of your pain and suffering. But in that praise God is most glorified and you will find peace.
Goosie and Miniman are doing wonderfully in school. Goosie came home with a progress report and I must admit that I felt like a failure. There is a 1 to 3 scale. 1 meaning that you need more help and attention in those area's and 3 meaning that you have grasped the lesson and are ready to move on to something else. My Goosie had 2's across the board. I blame myself, I know that I did not take her preschool as seriously as I should have and now instead of my bright little button being at the head of the class she is slightly behind. I have talked with a few people about this. My Mom and my friend H. They both said the same thing, that there is nothing wrong with Goosie being where she is and that it is still so early in the school year that it should be nothing to assist her however possible so that she can excel in all she does.
Miniman is doing wonderfully and is learning how to write his name. He is doing a fine job of it too! I think that he really likes to write the letter Z and rightly so as it is quite angular and I think will help him with writing all of the other letters in the alphabet. He had a class field trip last week and had so much fun it was all he could talk about for two days! Miniman and Hubby are playing trains in Miniman's room right now and I must admit that my heart smiles at the knowledge of their growing relationship.Oh and on a side note, the kids are requesting homework time!
Bubbles is quite the bubbly personality and I think she is hitting another growth spurt. She has been eating like craziness! I sometimes think she is just hiding it all in her toes! She just smiles and goes about her business. She is also quite at ease with things around her. Hubby was saying the other day that Bubbles is the most laid back of the three. She also has become more verbal, and her words are very definite. Bubbles knows what she likes that is for sure!
Hubby is doing as well as he can at work, there are things happening that shouldn't be happening and it is very frustrating at times. I can't get into things like I want to because lets face it there are something that don't need to be addressed unless you first address the individuals who are involved. Hubby said that he will handle things as he sees fit and I trust both his judgement and discretion. To do otherwise is not supportive, nor is it helping him in anyway. So I will say what I want in my head and let you all just pray that God will have his will and way in the situation. That being said, it has been a good run here in Ohio, but with Hubby up for retirement in a few years I can hardly wait for the one last move and get finally settled in our "Home".
On a lighter note, I volunteer with many things to keep myself busy. One of which is MOPS I am sure most of you have heard about MOPS and at least slightly aware of it. My role in MOPS is the hospitality coordinator. It is quite enjoyable and I must say at times it wears me out. But it is a good thing. I enjoy serving others and making sure things run smoothly. Behind the scenes I am quite content. At our last meeting we were talking about ways to recycle and different things we could do to teach our children different ways to be a good steward of one of God's most wonderful gifts.. our planet. I didn't bring my idea with me but wanted to share it anyway as I felt it was something anyone could do. It went something like this:
J. ~ "Does anyone have anything they would like to share with the group?"
Me~ " I grew a pot garden over the summer"
Then there were looks, giggles..
Me~ " wait that didn't sound right, it was a herb garden, oh wait that is even worse"
J. ~ "Well, you just never know what you are going to get when you come to MOPS!"
Me~ " yeah, don't eat the brownies.."
laughter
Me ~ " But really I used an egg carton to plant the seeds, then my kids and I transferred the plants to different containers I had used around the house. We had lettuce, tomatoes, peppers, cabbage, and all kinds of things growing from various containers. Goosie really liked it and all three kids really enjoyed watering the plants, it was something they looked forward to everyday."
After which I sat down.. I don't think I turned red, but I am not sure. After all I think it was Ben Franklin that said "a slip of the foot you may soon recover, but a slip of the tongue you may never get over". It was an interesting meeting.
I digress, I must end this entry here. There are things that need my attention that don't have keyboards. Until next time dear readers remember it is a sacrifice of praise that is the hardest to give, it is born out of your pain and suffering. But in that praise God is most glorified and you will find peace.
Monday, October 5, 2009
A New Van for Me??
I need a new van. Not a brand new one, but certainly a newer one then I currently have. Don't get me wrong 1998 was a good year. I just need something a little newer then that.
My current van we bought two years ago, when we lived in Sandpoint, before I had even thought of this blog. Now two and a half years later we are a few months from it being paid off and you guessed it, things are not working. The brake lights don't work when you have the exterior lights on (not good for driving at night), the vent system no longer works in the back (that means the kids are not getting heated/cooled unless I freeze/bake myself and the front passenger). The gas mileage is still good, it runs well, the only other down side is that it smells like wet dog when it rains, there is no storage in the rear, the carpets are stained beyond recognition and at times the doors tend to lock all by themselves when I already have the kids buckled in, the motor running and I am just walking around to the drivers side. Yes, I think it is time.
As our family has grown the cars I have driven have changed. When I was single I drove a 1999 Sunfire sedan, then after I moved to Washington to be with Hubby I drove a 1995 Chevy Tracker, then there was the 2004 Pontiac Grandam, and currently the 1998 Mercury Villager.
The Sunfire I returned to the dealership, the Tracker we sold to a friend, the Grandam Hubby drove for a bit before using it as a trade-in for his mustang, and we got the Villager because lets face it three car seats cannot fit in a Grandam. I picked out the Villager. Yes, it was me. We needed something that was cheap, could fit our growing family and safely get us to the East Coast. Villager has done that. But now I feel it is time for something a little newer. I don't want the newest van on the block. Just one with seating for 6 plus the driver, stow and go seats or ones I can just remove, dual sliding doors, and a little storage room in the back for a little more then 4 bags of groceries. Oh and I would like it to be a 2002 model at least so that I can safely tether the car seats into the van.
We will see what happens. I realize that most of you are thinking that the Villager is paid off in a matter of months so why not hold onto it until it falls apart. Well, I was thinking that we would have it longer then 2 1/2 years but it wasn't the best investment. The family needs something more reliable and safer. I know I know things are rough all around. But I am not wanting anything brand new, just new to me. And no I don't think that is asking too much.
My current van we bought two years ago, when we lived in Sandpoint, before I had even thought of this blog. Now two and a half years later we are a few months from it being paid off and you guessed it, things are not working. The brake lights don't work when you have the exterior lights on (not good for driving at night), the vent system no longer works in the back (that means the kids are not getting heated/cooled unless I freeze/bake myself and the front passenger). The gas mileage is still good, it runs well, the only other down side is that it smells like wet dog when it rains, there is no storage in the rear, the carpets are stained beyond recognition and at times the doors tend to lock all by themselves when I already have the kids buckled in, the motor running and I am just walking around to the drivers side. Yes, I think it is time.
As our family has grown the cars I have driven have changed. When I was single I drove a 1999 Sunfire sedan, then after I moved to Washington to be with Hubby I drove a 1995 Chevy Tracker, then there was the 2004 Pontiac Grandam, and currently the 1998 Mercury Villager.
The Sunfire I returned to the dealership, the Tracker we sold to a friend, the Grandam Hubby drove for a bit before using it as a trade-in for his mustang, and we got the Villager because lets face it three car seats cannot fit in a Grandam. I picked out the Villager. Yes, it was me. We needed something that was cheap, could fit our growing family and safely get us to the East Coast. Villager has done that. But now I feel it is time for something a little newer. I don't want the newest van on the block. Just one with seating for 6 plus the driver, stow and go seats or ones I can just remove, dual sliding doors, and a little storage room in the back for a little more then 4 bags of groceries. Oh and I would like it to be a 2002 model at least so that I can safely tether the car seats into the van.
We will see what happens. I realize that most of you are thinking that the Villager is paid off in a matter of months so why not hold onto it until it falls apart. Well, I was thinking that we would have it longer then 2 1/2 years but it wasn't the best investment. The family needs something more reliable and safer. I know I know things are rough all around. But I am not wanting anything brand new, just new to me. And no I don't think that is asking too much.
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