I did do a lot of research before my procedure. I had started a trail of paperwork as soon as I understood that I was eligible and that my insurance would cover it. That was 2004, now five years later I am sitting here, feeling the pain of the surgery still. For those of you wondering what exactly happened I hunted down this animated video..
http://video.about.com/womenshealth/Breast-Reduction.htm It helped answer many of the questions hubby had and it should help anyone else too.
There are parts of me that are still numb and other parts where the nerves have already formed the necessary attachments. Still there are things that I am feeling that I honestly don't want to feel. I am one week post-op and feeling okay. I have my Doctors appointment tomorrow morning. I feel very positive about it as the swelling has gone down, the stitches are itchy, and the bruising is mostly a sickly yellow. Hubby said that I was bruised every where that was covered by my bra, and honestly that is a whole lotta bruising!Hubby keeps reminding me to take my medication. I honestly just don't like the way it makes me feel. Numb all over is not a good thing for me, the pain is manageable so I almost don't see the point. But then there are nights like last night where I couldn't get comfortable enough to go to sleep. Hubby brought up my medication and then told me that no one expects me to be brave and recover without medication, and that he is sure everyone will think I am crazy for not taking it when I need it.
The kids are slowly getting used to Mommy not being able to do many things. And I am also learning my own boundaries. Not being able to pick up the kids is hard, mostly because I am so used to it. Hubby has taken over the house! Everything stays clean and put away, and for those of you who don't know there are many levels of clean, and Hubby's level of clean is higher then my level of clean. I cannot think of anything that he has not done. He has taken over the cooking, cleaning, diaper changing, potty training and all of the other things I had going on. Right now he has both the girls at Goosie's kindergarten test. Miniman is here with me, and I must say he is doing well. My mom will be here tomorrow night and I know that Hubby can hardly wait for some reinforcements..!
This past Saturday I went to the Battalion Organizational, it looked like a good time. Hubby was originally just going to take the kids, but I needed a change of scenery. I went and basically watched him take care of the kids, and had some help from some of the others there. I wasn't able to do anything but stand or sit around. I know I know that is all I should have been doing anyway! Church yesterday was interesting. Hubby had to take the kids to all of their classes as I wasn't able to. I know I know I am complaining, but really I am used to doing all of it and now to only be able to brush teeth, and fix hair... it kinda sucks!
Well, I need to get myself ready for the day and as you can imagine that takes longer then usual now. Maybe I will catch up on all the class work I haven't been able to do because I have been so busy. Until next time dear readers... blessings to you!
Monday, August 24, 2009
Thursday, August 20, 2009
3 Days After Surgery
I haven't posted in a while. First I was trying to get things as ready as possible for my upcoming surgery. Then there was all the things I didn't anticipate, now I am on day 3 post operation and things are settling into some what of a routine. I sleep most of the day because I am tired, and it makes it harder for the kids to climb on me. Hubby has be wonderful! He has been taking care of the kids and the house, I literally don't feel needed. Goosie and Miniman understand that I can't pick them up, Bubbles is less patient. I end up sitting on the floor when she decides that she wants me to hold her.
I have taken my first post op shower and like giving birth there is nothing better then getting cleaned up after a whole lotta mess. The girls are tender, the stitches a bit itchy, and oh yes the bruising is horrific! Really, it looks like I was in a bad movie and the girls were the stars (but that is kinda what happened).
Hubby took some pictures before the operation, and I am waiting to take the post operation pictures. Mostly because I can only wear button up shirts, and I only have a few of those.
The change is quite dramatic, 1/2 of each breast was taken off. When the Dr. did the markings I was a little shocked that each line represented a cut. The post operation bra is bulky, I had purchased a close front sports bra before the surgery and must admit that it feels better then the one the Dr.'s office supplied for me. I am trying to walk around the house, as Dr's orders are for me not to be dormant. I want so badly to do the things I used to on a regular basis, but cannot. It is so wonderful that Hubby is here to take care of everything, I don't know what I would do without him.
I put one of the bra's I used to wear most often on my chest and my new boobs didn't even touch the material! I know you all are wanting pictures and I will post some as soon as I get dressed (I have been wearing pj's since the operation). I can't wait to go bra shopping and get some of the ones I have been wanting to wear for as long as I can remember but couldn't because my breasts were too big. Then there are all of the clothes too.. I miss the ones I got rid of after having Goosie!
Other then that things have been going well. I was taking percocet for pain, but have down graded to Tylenol because I need to be aware of the pain. the percocet made my whole body numb and I thought I could do anything, by just taking the Tylenol I can realize my limits.
I have taken my first post op shower and like giving birth there is nothing better then getting cleaned up after a whole lotta mess. The girls are tender, the stitches a bit itchy, and oh yes the bruising is horrific! Really, it looks like I was in a bad movie and the girls were the stars (but that is kinda what happened).
Hubby took some pictures before the operation, and I am waiting to take the post operation pictures. Mostly because I can only wear button up shirts, and I only have a few of those.
The change is quite dramatic, 1/2 of each breast was taken off. When the Dr. did the markings I was a little shocked that each line represented a cut. The post operation bra is bulky, I had purchased a close front sports bra before the surgery and must admit that it feels better then the one the Dr.'s office supplied for me. I am trying to walk around the house, as Dr's orders are for me not to be dormant. I want so badly to do the things I used to on a regular basis, but cannot. It is so wonderful that Hubby is here to take care of everything, I don't know what I would do without him.
I put one of the bra's I used to wear most often on my chest and my new boobs didn't even touch the material! I know you all are wanting pictures and I will post some as soon as I get dressed (I have been wearing pj's since the operation). I can't wait to go bra shopping and get some of the ones I have been wanting to wear for as long as I can remember but couldn't because my breasts were too big. Then there are all of the clothes too.. I miss the ones I got rid of after having Goosie!
Other then that things have been going well. I was taking percocet for pain, but have down graded to Tylenol because I need to be aware of the pain. the percocet made my whole body numb and I thought I could do anything, by just taking the Tylenol I can realize my limits.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Internal Dialogue and Cleaning
The weekend is over and as it is Monday my internal dialogue has started up again. While Hubby is home I try to take a break from the house cleaning and other demands so that I can just spend time with him and the kids. Monday comes around and I find myself trying to clean up after the weekend. This is how things have been going in my house since Goosie joined our family and with the addition of each child, the house understandably has gotten a little messier, if only for the weekend.
Before we had children, I prided myself in having the house clean and dinner ready when Hubby came home from work. This has gotten harder, and my internal dialogue has not changed. I still want to have everything as ready as possible when he gets home from work. I sometimes spend my entire day cleaning up the house..as for the entire day it gets messy. It is almost like the mess follows the kids..hmm! Anyway, when Goosie joined our family Hubby told me that the kids come before the house and that if he comes home and the house is a mess, it is fine so long as the kids are taken care of.
So now the dialogue struggle. "The house needs to be clean and dinner ready, no the kids need to be taken care of first." "Don't worry about how much clean up there is, just make sure the kids have a good time today. " These are the things that go through my mind on an almost daily basis, let me be honest sometimes it's hourly.
Do I think I have good kids, yes! Do I think my house cleaning can wait, sometimes. Do I think that my relationship with my kids is suffering because of all the things I think I need to get done, yes.
Hubby told me that he woke up at 0500 with the same thoughts on his mind. His dialogue goes something like this. " I am tired from work, I just want to watch this show." or " The kids are just trying to get attention, I can do this later, but I really want some time just to myself."
Yes, there was a time when after Hubby got home from work he and I had carved out alone time. He would have his as soon as he got home, it usually lasted about an hour and he didn't have to worry about doing anything with the kids. After he had his alone time I would take mine. I would have an hour to do what I wanted. In theory this works. And it is a great idea. However I have learned that some idea's don't mesh with reality.
Goosie, Miniman and Bubbles are great kids. They really do listen and are very helpful. There are times when things get out of hand and I know it is those times when I should be paying more attention to all the animated things in my life instead of all the inanimate.
Admitting there is a problem is the first step. Changing internal dialogue is easier said then done, but I am going to. My children are the most important people in my life aside from Hubby and I have been saying that a clean house is a sign of a wasted life.. I have been wasting mine.. but starting today I am going to change. If that means that my house is a mess, so be it.. my family is more important. After all whenever I am gone I would rather people say that "she was a good wife, mom and friend" more then "yeah, her house was always clean." What really matters is not how clean or perfect my house is, it is more that my family knows how valued they are to me and that they both know and feel loved.
Before we had children, I prided myself in having the house clean and dinner ready when Hubby came home from work. This has gotten harder, and my internal dialogue has not changed. I still want to have everything as ready as possible when he gets home from work. I sometimes spend my entire day cleaning up the house..as for the entire day it gets messy. It is almost like the mess follows the kids..hmm! Anyway, when Goosie joined our family Hubby told me that the kids come before the house and that if he comes home and the house is a mess, it is fine so long as the kids are taken care of.
So now the dialogue struggle. "The house needs to be clean and dinner ready, no the kids need to be taken care of first." "Don't worry about how much clean up there is, just make sure the kids have a good time today. " These are the things that go through my mind on an almost daily basis, let me be honest sometimes it's hourly.
Do I think I have good kids, yes! Do I think my house cleaning can wait, sometimes. Do I think that my relationship with my kids is suffering because of all the things I think I need to get done, yes.
Hubby told me that he woke up at 0500 with the same thoughts on his mind. His dialogue goes something like this. " I am tired from work, I just want to watch this show." or " The kids are just trying to get attention, I can do this later, but I really want some time just to myself."
Yes, there was a time when after Hubby got home from work he and I had carved out alone time. He would have his as soon as he got home, it usually lasted about an hour and he didn't have to worry about doing anything with the kids. After he had his alone time I would take mine. I would have an hour to do what I wanted. In theory this works. And it is a great idea. However I have learned that some idea's don't mesh with reality.
Goosie, Miniman and Bubbles are great kids. They really do listen and are very helpful. There are times when things get out of hand and I know it is those times when I should be paying more attention to all the animated things in my life instead of all the inanimate.
Admitting there is a problem is the first step. Changing internal dialogue is easier said then done, but I am going to. My children are the most important people in my life aside from Hubby and I have been saying that a clean house is a sign of a wasted life.. I have been wasting mine.. but starting today I am going to change. If that means that my house is a mess, so be it.. my family is more important. After all whenever I am gone I would rather people say that "she was a good wife, mom and friend" more then "yeah, her house was always clean." What really matters is not how clean or perfect my house is, it is more that my family knows how valued they are to me and that they both know and feel loved.
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